not goodbye

Those tears that almost incapacitated me last weekend... I am now counting them as a gift... a beautiful gift that I will be ever thankful for. Thursday night we gathered for dinner... my parents, my sister, my Gramma and my own kids & husband. It was a change of plans... but a welcome one. My Gramma's trip got moved up just a couple of days, but somehow, I was okay with it. It was a fantastic evening. Camden pushed Gramma around in her borrowed wheelchair... we poked around a shop or two, and gazed out at fountains and waterfalls that were scattered around the outdoor mall. It was beautiful. The mall... the breeze... just being together. Our dinner conversation was lively and I don't think I will ever forget the light in my Gramma's eyes as she realized that Eric was armed (he was coming from a security detail.) A little excitement, I suppose. We reminisced... all of us... and as I looked around the table at the ones I love most on this earth, I saw the beginnings of tears forming in glistening eyes. But not me. I had had my tears and my sorrow... and tonight was for joy. God reminded me of that last week... and His gift to me was priceless. My heart ached for my family... and those tears they held back... I hope they had the chance to let them fall. I hope they had their chance to grieve for this moment in our life... and then push on with a smile. Because this was not goodbye... it was simply until we meet again.